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Silvia Hartmann writes: This is a repost from Nicola Quinn's EFT/Anxiety Self Help list with my response.
I go through the sender's mail and "extract the opening statements" for her, not as therapy, but as an example of how you do that.
It is really interesting and has never ceased to fascinate me how the disturbances in the energy system are MARKED UP in the language a person uses.
How using those EXACT phrases will completely unlock the system and change it, when using other phrasings that do not contain those EXACT words and phrases does absolutely nothing.
I really do think EFT should be taught at any NLP practitioner training, if only as proof of how from the deep structure ideas and words arise so very specifically and in a direct cause and effect fashion.
I also advise any student of NLP (or human behaviour, for that matter!) to start paying attention to these linguistic markers in people's speech, and rather than to try and disconnect or change *the marker*, to head for the deep structure and to make the changes there.
This is also such a priceless feedback mechanism as when the change has been made in the energy system (which is what the deep structure actually is!), then it is IMMEDIATELY reflected in the language a person uses.
The language itself is state dependent and to keep that intact is immensely important.
Still and after all of this, here's an example of how to extract EFT opening statements for self help and make yourself in essence a perfect EFT self help programme.
I enjoyed doing this and it is fascinating to note that I still believe EFT to be the best self help technique EVER. After 7 years of this and all I've been through, that's some recommendation.
Future orientated greetings to all,
Silvia
-----Original Message-----
From: Anxiety-Help-With-Nicola@yahoogroups.com
On Behalf Of Jenny
Sent: 03 June 2005 09:39
Hello everyone here,
I have been having PA's and chronic anxiety for almost ten years. I have given up work (college lecturer/counsellor) and pretty much
don't go anywhere (I get very panicky when I go further than about 10 miles from home). I have read Nicola's excellent book, and I've
tried EFT but I'm a bit confused about just what I'm tapping for.
The problem is that I learned to 'control' my (classic) panic attacks quite early on, but my (very clever!) body found different ways to draw my attention to my 'burning house'. So instead of classic PA's, I will feel terribly sick, and or get problems with my eyesight, and or get jelly legs (so that I bump into things), and so many other things over the years that I just don't trust myself any more. My confidence is at zero. I just don't know what my body will come up with next.
My burning house is, I THINK, something to do with assertiveness, and also my relationship with my mother. My mother is ill at the moment, and in hospital 150 miles away, and I'm in agonies of guilt because I can't go and see her. I am truly at the end of my tether - I'm having psychotherapy, but
of course it's by phone because I won't travel to where she practices. I can see no way out, and everyone here talks about how brilliant EFT is - and I just don't think I'm doing it right.
I would be so grateful for any help. I truly am desperate. I have a superb husband, who is utterly supportive (and reckons it's
all down to my relationship with my mum - he says she's controlling and unkind).
Thank you for listening
Jenny x
Response:
Jenny, EFT is so marvellous because YOU get to CONTROL exactly what you're tapping on.
Make a list and just tap through it to start with, so you get to learn how it FEELS and just what kind of things work for you, what type of statments, and how you respond (it's like you're learning to become your own therapist and get to know yourself in the process).
>From your mail, there are a heap of opening statements you can try out:
- I have had chronic anxiety for almost ten years and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
That would be a good start to any "let's listen to Jenny and try and balance her energy system so she feels better" session to begin with.
- I don't go anywhere
- I'm a bit confused about just what I'm tapping for.
- Even though I tried to 'control' my (classic) panic attacks ...
- Evn though I will feel terribly sick, ....
- Even though I problems with my eyesight,
- Even though I get jelly legs ....
- Even though I bump into things ...
Confidence Set:
- Even though I just don't trust myself any more ...
- Even though my confidence is at zero.
- Even though I just don't know what my body will come up with next ...
- Even though I THINK my burning house is something to do with assertiveness ...
- Even though I THINK, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
**** I'd make that one a priority if I were you.>
Next set:
Even though my mother is ill, I deeply ...
Even though I'm in agonies of guilt ....
Even though I am truly at the end of my tether ...
Next set:
Even though I can see no way out, ...
Even though I just don't think I'm doing it right...
Even though I truly am desperate ...
Even though I ave a superb husband ...
Even though my husband says my mother is controlling and unkind ...
As you can see, I just took your own words from your email, paragraph by paragraph, to highlight just HOW you create your own custom made opening statements with EFT from what YOU are thinking, feeling and saying.
It's one of the truly amazing things about EFT - you get to LISTEN TO YOUR SELF and HEAR YOUR SELF tell your self what's wrong, all the time, as you're telling it to others.
Print this out and tap all the statements over a period of time, as and when, as your very own "custom training for Jenny in EFT".
Not to "cure" you of all your ills, but just to get to know how Jenny and EFT get along, how it works, what it feels like.
It's an education in your own energy system, and how your thoughts, energy flow, emotions and symptoms hang together REALLY in truth and all reality.
This is the first step on a truly amazing journey, and one we have all taken, and one that was probably one of the greatest eye openers we've ever had.
And for all the others who are listening, try this method to find your own words to make your own opening statments.
Sit down and write an email, you don't need to post it, really let go and tell it as it is, what troubles you and what winds you up, and then go through it and extract the opening statements as though you were your own therapist, just like I have just done, write them out clearly, print them out and
... start tapping!
That's the way forward to a completely different future altogether, and should THAT idea cause some anxiety, well ...
"I have a future and I deeply and profoundly LOVE and ACCEPT myself!"
Take heart, have faith, start tapping!
Golden sunshine,
Silvia :-)
Silvia Hartmann
http://StarFields.org
Easy Free EFT Information:
http://123EFT.com
EFT Anxiety Self Help Group:
http://yahoogroups.com/group/Anxiety-Help-With-Nicola
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