|
I chose a chocolate peanut butter cup. Immediately I feel obsessed, want to grab it, eat it and get more right away! I felt out of control of my behavior in relation to this piece of chocolate. I feel happy thinking about eating it and angry and frustrated at myself for feeling so obsessed and addicted to it. I didn't even care about really enjoying it but just getting it in my mouth right away. And then finding another one to eat!
I told the chocolate I was very angry at its existence because I felt I could not resist it, that it had control over me. It felt mocking to me but I also got a sense that the "chocolate" also knew I had choice if I only could see things differently. The more I stared at it and thought about it the obsessive feeling was more frustrating as I know I can go for a time without eating chocolate. However, my mind will still be thinking about eating chocolate. I began tapping on "Obsessed". Then "frustrated". Then "Out of control".
I now felt less obsessed and more removed and objective when looking at the chocolate. I still wanted it but I didn't feel as out of control. I tapped on "wanting more and more", "having just one". I became aware of not always believing that I can have what I want and this chocolate was something I could easily have. I almost forgot it was there while I was tapping as I went more inward. I tapped on "believing I can choose and have what I desire". I felt much more calm. I was seeing the chocolate differently now.
I realized how I believed things might be taken away from me that I love and food was something I could easily control and choose. Food had become an emotional substitute and pacifier of sorts when I felt anxious, sad, upset, alone, powerless, etc. I then tapped on "eating for nourishment, pleasure and enjoyment", "deserving of my choices" and "deserving of pleasurable things in life". I ended with a great round for "Nourishing my soul (with my choices)"! By the end of the exercise I felt energized and more energetically removed from the obsession connection with the chocolate.
I felt more peaceful within myself. I felt more connected to my self and in my own body. I now saw the chocolate more clearly for what it was not just feeling the internal obsession and panic to eat it. I could study it and think about what it meant to me.
I decided to eat it just to see if the experience would be different than before this exercise. I almost didn't want it! It tasted really good. I chewed it slowly and enjoyed it thoroughly. I actually tasted it instead of simply inhaling it! I had a greater appreciation for what it was and did not feel I had to now eat a whole bag of them! I felt a love for myself greater then for the chocolate.
I felt empowered and proud of myself!
** Further Info **
|
